"The missus varnished this porch herself. Don't go trackin' mud all over it." - Varney
Varney is a middle aged black bird that is neighbors with Selma, Mr. Chazokov, and the Santellos. He is frequently found relaxing on his front porch. He has a significant other.
Although not a major character, he is one of the few supporting characters to appear in every chapter of the game.
Appearance[]
Varney is a slightly chubby, middle aged black male bird, with a balding spot at the back of his head, an orange beak, and black-green eyes.
He wears a yellow and brown hat, a green short sleeves shirt, blue pants, and dirty yellow boots.
Personality[]
Not much is known about Vaney's personality. What little we do know paint him as an individual who cares deeply about his private property, personal space, and boundaries. He often chastises Mae for constantly walking on his front porch, despite his insistence that she leave him and his property alone. He's threatened to call the cops, to shoot, and to sue those who violate his boundaries, though these threats are often empty.
Despite his property being his extremely important to him, he is a generally amicable and friendly individual when not worrying about it, and even cracks jokes with his neighbors (often at their own expense).
Background[]
At some point, prior to the start of Night in the Woods, he paid Mae to babysit his cat. His missus supposedly varnished his front porch with her own hands.
Despite appearing in every chapter, Varney has no real side story or part in the main story. Every chapter, and every day, he can be located on his town house porch, next to Selmer's and Mr. Chazokov's apartment. He usually has one/two lines, and his conversations generally lead back to him not wanting Mae / his neighbors to mess with his property.
Trivia[]
- Despite Varney appearing in every chapter, his name is not once spoken in-game, he is only called Varney on his sprites in the game-files.
- Varney may not be his real name, and may just be a nickname the devs gave him, since he cares about his front porch so much, and you can varnish a porch. It may also be because his wife apparently varnished his front porch once.
- Varney plays the banjo.